Joke Only On Librarianship
March 2024
Ersyl Tatoy Biray
Student
inside a library: "Do you know one walking dictionary here?"
Librarian:
"We don't walk dictionaries here. We sit them."
Ersyl Tatoy
Biray
WJ Manares
A
group of students on the third floor of a library were making noise. Due to
their noise, the librarian told them, "Lower your voices!"
All
the boys hurriedly went down to the second floor.
Willer
Jun A. Manares
Banga,
Aklan
Melchor F. Cichon
Student
to a Librarian: "Sir, do we have a copy of the book, "Without Seeing
the Dawn".
Librarian:
"Sorry, we only have "Without Seeing the Book". Melchor F.
Cichon
Melchor F. Cichon
A
student to his classmates: "Who do you think is the noisiest person in the
Library?"
One
of his classmates answered: "The librarian herself!"
***Melchor
F. Cichon
Ersyl Tatoy Biray
Reading
a signage in the library, a student curiously asks the staff: "Is it
'Silence Please' or 'Silence Place'?"
Batting
an eyelash, the staff answers: "You get silence in this place, or I place
you in silence."
-Ersyl Tatoy
Biray
Melchor F. Cichon
A
signage in front of library staff's table reads: "Don't disturb. I'm
busy!!!"
When
a student peeps on the library staff's cellphone, he finds out that the staff
is busy playing Mobile Legends (ML).--Melchor F. Cichon
Ersyl Tatoy Biray
Browsing
on the stack in the library, a student finds a fiction book authored by a
popular writer. He took it from the shelf and ask the staff if this can be
borrowed overnight.
Student:
"Can I sleep with this for a night?"
Staff:
"Huh? Sorry, but that book is 'Taken'*. We have 'Single'** here for you if
you like."
*Eric
Bowman
**K.L.
Slater
--Ersyl Tatoy
Biray
Melchor F. Cichon
A
librarian asked a group of students why they go to the library.
Student
A: I go to the library to read books.
Student
B: I go to the library to sleep. It's cool there.
Student
C: I go to the library to charge my Cell Phone and play ML.
Student
D: I go to the library to meet my boyfriend.
Melchor F. Cichon
Student:
I heard that the library is the heart of the university. How about you Ma'am?
Librarian:
I am the head of the University.
***Melchor F.
Cichon
WJ Manares
It's
getting late, but the librarian found out that there's still a student reading
inside the library. She was concerned and decided to talk to him.
Librarian:
Excuse me, why are you still reading that book? You can continue tomorrow.
Student:
I'm sorry, Madame.
Librarian:
Anyway, I will wait for you. Just finish that chapter you're reading.
Student:
Thank you for your consideration, Madame.
Librarian:
May I ask what the title of that book is?
Student:
"*The Neverending Story."
*("Die
unendliche Geschichte" is a fantasy novel by German writer Michael Ende,
published in 1979. The first English translation, by Ralph Manheim, was
published in 1983).
Willer
Jun A. Manares
Banga,
Aklan
Melchor F. Cichon
Librarian
to a student inside the library: Read and your imagination will fly high. By
the way, what is your favorite book and magazine?
Student:
Twilight (The Twilight Saga, by Stephenie Meyer*) and Playboy Magazine.
*This
book is listed number one as the worst book ever published (https://www.goodreads.com/.../2.The_Worst_Books_of_All_Time)
GOODREADS.COM
The Worst Books of All Time (7865 books)
Alrom Christian P.
Ricafuente
Male
student: Ma'am, can I borrow any romantic novels?
Librarian:
Yes, you can. I guess you are inspired to have a girlfriend.
Male
Student: I don't have a girlfriend. But I have a boyfriend.
Ersyl Tatoy BirayTeacher to student: "If the library is the heart of the school, what is the librarian?"
Student: "The kidney, Ma'am. She filters the books, and cleanses the delinquent borrowers!"
Melchor F. CichonStudent: Ma'am, may I reserve the Discussion Room?
Librarian: Sorry, two lovebirds are still using it. They are still discussing their break-up.
Ersyl Tatoy BirayGoing
inside the library at noontime, all tables seemed to have been occupied
by students, thus, someone asked the library staff. "Are there
available tables here?
The staff replied: "We have enough. Which would you want: periodic table, multiplication table, table of contents ...?"
Melchor F. Cichon
Napansin ng isang library staff ang isang estudyanteng babae na pabalik-balik sa book shelves. Linapitan niya ito.Library staff: Miss, anong libro ang hinahanap mo? Baka pwede kitang matulungan.Estudyante: Hindi libro ang hinahanap ko kundi yong gwapong bookworm na nakasabay ko sa hagdan kanina.Library staff: A, yon ba? Naroon siya sa Discussion Room nakikipagtukaan kay Mary. --Melchor F. Cichon
A young male student: Ma'am, are you a book?
A charming library staff: Why?
A young male student: I want to book with you tonight. --Melchor F. Cichon, April 5, 2024
Why is salt not allowed in the library?
Because it is a-sin. --Melchor F. Cichon, April 5, 2024
Student to a Library Staff: Maam, do we have a book entitled Kanto by Tan Go?
Library Staff: Yes, but someone has reserved it.
--Melchor F. Cichon, April 8, 2024
WJ Manaresonly the book, "Sa Iyo't Iyo Lamang" is available.--WJ Manares, April 8, 2024